Perfect bodies duvet cover
Sex life gone a bit... stale? Finding excuses to stay up surfing the internetweb rather than face your other half in the sack again? Having regular encounters with Mr Floppy? WHAT KIND OF A MAN ARE YOU, EH? YOU'RE A DISGRACE! Oh, hang on, sorry, I was intending to be sensitive.
What I meant to say was, perhaps what's missing is a comedy duvet. Y'know, with two naked human bodies on it, so that when you and your missus get into bed, you look like two marvellous specimens. Well, you do from above, if someone was floating above your bed looking down, and had dodgy spatial vision.
But anyway, at £32.95 (double) or £34.95 (king), the Perfect Bodies duvet is sure to solve your sexual woes in a matter of minutes. Probably. Sorry gay men and lesbian women, it appears to be heterosexuals only, unless you buy two and can do something whizzy with a sewing machine. BUY IT