It’s that time of year again when the nominations for the
Most Useless, sorry, Mercury Prize are announced. The Mercury Prize has an impressive track history of bestowing its paper weight on bands and singers who go on to do absolutely nothing of note after their "win". Talvin Singh? Ms Dynamite? Franz Ferdinand? Er, M People? Speak up please, we can’t hear you.
Having said that, the Arctic Monkeys, up against the likes of Amy Winehouse and the Klaxons, have broken that trend with two breakthrough albums and could be onto their second Mercury Prize win on the trot. This is despite how incomprehensibly bland they are. Vitriolic comments in defense of the talentless, pre-pubescent little gimps can be left in the usual place.
So, without further ado, let me present, for your voting pleasure, the 12 nominees hoping to win a lump of metal and lots of radio play this coming September. I guarantee the victors of our poll won’t reflect the actual prize winners on the night. If it does, I’ll voluntarily buy both of the Arctic Monkey’s albums, and listen to them simultaneously for 24 hours straight. While naked.