Top Five: Euroflash- Masculinity or Insecurity?

thirt.jpgWith guidebook and ability to say thank-you in tow, I was an innocent tourist. At least that was until I saw him from across the road. The letters emblazoned on his back in plush gold velvet shone with insecurity- “Vagina Lover.” Welcome to testosterone Euroflash-style.

It made me wonder about the power of sexuality through fashion. I’m not talking about the Azzedine Alaia flashing of flesh but the establishing of our own preference (and much more) through what we wear. A recent commentator on men.style claimed that the lowest thing a man could do was wear clothes that could be mistaken for women’s. Does that ban drainpipe denim, skinny scarves and thin knits (all within my wardrobe) from the outfits of the modern man. In my opinion a man of those opinions shouldn’t really be dabbling in the androgynous fashion industry. Read on for a Top Five of Euroflasher War Paint.


elkann2.jpgWe in Britain are hardly guilt-free when it comes to this pseudo-sexual dressing- my friend with the infamous t-shirt collection was recently seen touting a new addition to his collection. The ‘Man and the Legend’ shirt (as seen above,) is a rather brash statement towards the more physical aspects of masculinity. The current trend for killer suits, as seen on Mad Men, could be viewed by some as a sartorial power-trip. Lapo Elkann, a man praised for his risk-taking and prowess with clothing is never seen without the chest rug and Amazonian arm hanger. Where does it go from cool to cringe? How orange is too orange?

As EU members ourselves, the more laddish of our readers may wonder how to avoid falling into the trap of fake-tanned, Cavalli-clad party-goers. Yes, we have reached a point in our existence where that many hyphens are perfectly necessary.

Just avoid the following;

peter.jpgSpeedos
So obvious but so (visually) painful in their abundance, these strips of supposed manhood have haunted beaches for decades. Learn from Peter Stringfellow (right) and know that there is no comfort in flaunting your not-so-manly arse. Sand spread, fabric rash, trapping of hair- do I need to list the ways in which Speedos are wrong?

cigars.jpgCigars
Oh I know it’s obvious but how unfair that Dean Martin’s beloved should be sidelined to the ranks of VIP lounges in Russian nightclubs. A sign of wealth, power and corruption (be it material or in the case of the Euroflasher sartorial,) cigars are a favourite pastime of men who want to exude an air of masculinity-commonly mistaken by anyone sane as arrogance.

psp.jpgBling
From Flavor Flav to Stefano Gabbana, bling is found in the form of chains, bracelets and even anklets. When Valentino fancied John Barrowman he supposedly gave him a sapphire neck chain in order to watch his eyes sparkle against the sea. Yes that’s right, Valentino ‘Oompa Loompa’ Garavani, fashion king.

d&g.jpgDolce & Gabbana Trainers
No Euroflash stomping-ground, be it St. Barts, Miami, Milan or Romania, is complete without the footprints of D&G trainers. You know the ones- small, leather, gold, velvet, silver logos, all within one shoe. Worn with colour rim t-shirts and faded jeans, these are the it-items of the Euroflasher’s walk-in wardrobe.

sylstallone.jpgBoxing Kit/ Too-tight Vests/ Slogan Tees
Now this is what separates the flash from the trash. A sign of their intelligence, ego and chauvinism, slogan tees allow the Euroflash to stand out from the crowd and boast of their dolce vitas. From orientation to kinky fetishes- a lot can be revealed with the power of iron-on letters.

(Image Source (top to bottom): i heart couture, Daily Mail, Broadweighs Cigars, Cnet, Diabro, Wikimedia)

By Will Reid | April 14th, 2008





Will ReidTop Five: Euroflash- Masculinity or Insecurity?
  • http://ilovedinomartin.blogspot.com dino martin peters

    Hey pallies, love the Dinoref…”but how unfair that Dean Martin’s beloved should be sidelined to the ranks of VIP lounges in Russian nightclubs.” But, never knew that cigars where Dinobeloved. Our Dino did smoke some stogies in westerns, but Kent Cigarettes were his smoke of choice.

  • Will Reid

    Wow! I’m surprisingly jealous of your Dean Martin knowledge! I wasn’t actually sure about the cigar reference but more trying to display the deterioration of an icon through modern use- if that makes any sense at all!

  • poppy112

    バーバリーバッグが製造する上質な革バッグ、バーバリーシャツを、メーカー直販価格でお届けいたします。お求めやすい価格で、バーバリーアウトレットはさまざま高級商品を備えます。バーバリーバッグ や女性向けの可愛いバーバリー財布など手作り革製品のオンラインショップです。全品送料無料で非常にやすいです。
    人気の海外バーバリーブランドのバーバリーシャツを数多く取り揃えております。勿論全品本物保障!全国迅速発送!
    ネットで商売しているバーバリーバッグは汚れるものなので何枚あっても重宝しますので、贈り物として喜ばれています。

    みなさんは、バーバリーアウトレット 、と言われた時、どのようなイメージが思い浮かぶでしょうか。
    バーバリーのバーバリー財布 とは、その集団を表す象徴と言っても過言ではありません。
    ひと目で印象を左右し、記憶に残りやすいものだからこそ、既製品ではなく、こだわりを持ったオリジナルなデザインにしたいものです。
    しかし、そのようなバーバリーシャツ を、自分達だけで作れるでしょうか。