Hero of the day: John Cooper Clarke

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Name John Cooper Clarke Job One man riot, poet and punk. Special Powers The Bard of Salford. Poncey people would say his job is as ‘a performance poet’. He said ‘I played a gig in Cardiff last week and had a run in with the Welsh Mafia; They made me an offer I couldn’t understand…’ They said Clarke’s high-speed, Salford-twanged …

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Lamborghini X Versace Murcielago

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This is without doubt the most bling car the world has ever seen. An ordinary Lambo Murcielago is pretty damn bling, but a limited edition (just ten are being made!) Versace version is bling to the power of 100. Expect it to feature heavily in the next ‘Puff Daddy/Diddy/whatever the hell he’s calling himself now’ music video, no doubt adorned …

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Have an eco Xmas with an organic tree

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Forget those plastic Christmas trees you’ve been eyeing up in the shop. Especially the singing ones. Plastic trees may manage to hold on to their bristles when the cat brushes past, but they’re not exactly eco-friendly are they? If you want to outdo David Cameron for flaunting your green credentials, how about an organic Norway Spruce sapling, which will sit …

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The doorkey LED torch

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For all the press release’s talk of "night safety", it’s blatantly clear that True Utility’s LockLite gadget has one use, and one use only. It’s to prevent that embarrassing 30 seconds of fumbling when you arrive home after a night on the beers, and can’t find your front door lock. Hurrah! It’s a little gizmo that fixes onto your key …

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Hero of the day: Ted Chippington

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Name Francis Smyth, aka Ted Chippington Job Stand-up comedian, underrated poet of the people. Special Powers Dry one-liners, making hecklers look stupid. He said ‘I was walking down the road the other day, this chap drove up beside me and said, "Excuse me, mate, I’m in a dilemma." I said, "Aye, good motors, Dilemmas. I was thinking of buying one …

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Canon Powershot G7

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Canon’s new G7 is a serious camera, for serious photographers. It hasn’t been designed to fit in a handbag, or to look good in a range of pastel colours. No, it’s been designed to take excellent pictures, and it does that just fine. If a DSLR is too bulky for your needs, then the G7 makes an ideal compact alternative. …

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Monkey mag launched

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Monkeys are ace aren’t they? Firstly, they’re the funniest creatures in the zoo. Secondly, some of them are fantastic in films (just look at Any Which Way but Loose). They also let us get up to no good with their clever invention of ‘monkey business’. Well, keeping in theme, a new lad rag called Monkey Mag has launched today which …

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Speedseat F1 racing seat

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Forget negotiating the twists and turns of a console F1 circuit using a regular joypad. What you want is a Speedseat racing seat, which is a fully adjustable platform in which to park your bottom while haring through virtual chicanes. It folds up so can be stashed behind the sofa when not in use (after all, you wouldn’t sit your …

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Team Losi 8ight 4WD competition buggy

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Okay, so I’ll admit I know very little about remote-controlled cars, especially when buying them from proper RC websites (as opposed to whatever cartoon spin-off is on sale in Woolworths this week). But the Team Losi 8ight 1:8 4WD Competition Buggy looks pretty smart to me. It’s got a centrally-mounted motor, oversized shocks, a 4-shoe clutch and an extra-thick machined …

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USB FM Music

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Now this is cool. Forget the hundreds of silly USB gadgets that have sprung up in the last few months (despite the fact that no-one I know has ever bought a single one of them. Ever.) Instant FM Music is shaped like a USB key, but lets you tune into FM and web radio stations, record individual programmes, and even …

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Hero of the day: Sheriff John Bunnell

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Name John Bunnell Job Big voiced ex cop, soundtracking a thousand TV cop chases. Special Powers Talking the talk and offering crims their ‘gunishment’. He said "Jack may be nimble. Jack maybe quick. But when Jack takes on the Cleveland County PD, he’s going to GET BURNED!" They said Bunnell has been described as using "cheesy, over exagerated melodrama, blatent …

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Jonas Damon cube clock

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This bizarre clock thing is from the mind of Jonas Damon. He’s got a ‘Open Edition’ which is a collection of home objects that arrives at the new by revisiting the familiar. Sound pretentious? Yes. Looks cool? Bigger yes. All the pieces of the collection are surreal twists on bog standard items. The clock is a series of black cubes, …

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BMW 3 Series convertible

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So this is the new BMW 3-Series convertible. What do you think? We think it’s pretty damn unpretty. The proportions seem slightly off – it just seems muscular in the wrong places, if that makes any sense at all. Anyhoo, it’s a BMW 3-Series convertible, so it’ll sell like hot cakes. You’ll be able to buy it this spring, initially …

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Nokia 330 GPS navigator

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The 330 is Nokia’s first dedicated GPS sat-nav system. What took ‘em so long? It features a 3.5-inch colour touchscreen and a speaker for audio route guidance which doubles up as a speaker for music playback – the device also functions as an MP3 and video player, as well as being able to display digital images, all via SD card. …

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B&O Serene mobile

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They don’t just make hi-fis and funny-shaped home telephones, y’know. The US is getting rather excited this week about Serene, which is Bang & Olufsen’s first mobile phone, produced in partnership with Samsung. It’s been out here in Europe for a while, but we thought it was worth reminding you of the handset they say has "the purest relationship between …

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Hero of the day: James the Cat

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Name James The Cat Job Posho layabout feline. Special Powers Dossing. Chasing birds and butterflies. Hanging around with Dragons, Frogs, Kangaroos, Snails and others. He said "My name’s James, James The Cat….       I’ve had fame, money, and all that!…" They said Frida the Snail… a talking snail at that had a pop at James when he became (rather …

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